9 Reasons Why People Give UpSep 24, 2022
We all have dreams. Whether buying a home or becoming a movie star, our dreams call us to make them a reality.
However, most people give up and succumb to the enemies that cause them to surrender.
According to science, 92% of people don't achieve their goals. So to ensure our victory in this uphill fight, we must educate ourselves on why we might surrender.
As Sun Tzu brilliantly stated:
“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained, you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”
We can prepare accordingly if we know our enemies before starting our journey. Understanding these enemies can help you avoid and overcome them to achieve your dreams.
They Try to Avoid Pain
The biggest reason why people quit is that it's uncomfortable.
They lack resiliency.
Listen, the journey for our goals and dreams is challenging. It's supposed to be that way. We are attracted to what we want to become the best version of ourselves.
Trying and failing is the formula. Fail, fail again, fail--but get closer, and then, finally, succeed.
But it's knowing at the start that pain will be a part of the process. Then, when you know it will suck, you can plan and prepare for it.
As David Goggins has said:
“Get comfortable being uncomfortable.”
If the discomfort doesn't bother you, then you'll endure. You will persevere and eventually cross that finish line.
Anyone can throw in the towel. Few can go the distance.
Thicken your skin, and don't quit.
They Listen to Others
Listening to others can be beneficial.
However, those that give up typically listen to the wrong people. They listen to theorists and not practitioners. They listen to apprehensive friends and family members and adopt their concerns and worry.
We must remember to listen only to those who have done it or, more importantly, who are currently doing it.
If we take the words of others to heart, it can plant seeds of doubt within us. This moment is the beginning of the end. More on this later.
I made this mistake with my first business. I took advice from many who had never run a Shopify store, and I lost money.
We have to remember to stay quiet when it comes to our dreams. The more people we tell, the more we invite their $0.02 in, along with their doubt.
Remember, they can only tell us about their experiences.
They Are Impatient
I suck at patience, but it's essential.
You can work all day, every day. Guess what? It's still going to take time.
You can have the perfect diet, trainer, and workout plan. But it's still going to take time to see any visible transformation.
And it's like that with our dreams.
We live in the age of instant gratification and are accustomed to getting things quickly. We can order, text, call, stream, and swipe right on our desires.
But the things that matter in life take time. Of course, it's essential to do all that can be done each day, but when it comes to the big goals and dreams, it could take years.
You can't swipe right and become a black belt. You can't Amazon prime your dream body or order the relationship you desire.
Brace yourself for the long haul. Commit to getting better at your craft versus seeking the result this red-hot second.
They Have a Poor Strategy
Poor planning will yield poor results.
It's essential to have a blueprint of action. If your strategy isn't clear, then you have no direction. When there's no direction, you get lost.
When driving, we plug our destination into an app like google maps. There are directions to follow for the quickest and easiest way to get where we want to go.
Why don't we do that with life?
Where are you now? Where do you want to go? Once you have those answers, do your best to reverse-engineer the process. Then, create a bullet-pointed plan that you can follow.
Then, implement the plan.
They Lack Flexibility
Having a plan and strategy is excellent.
However, as you probably know, life doesn't always go as planned. It will surprise you. You will encounter obstacles, setbacks, and speed bumps along the way.
So it would be best if you learned to be flexible.
Remember this quote from The Marines:
“Adapt. Improvise. Overcome.”
Strategies are great. Having an immovable system that is concrete is foolish. Pivoting, altering, or changing your plan will help you move forward.
Remember, a palm tree isn't as strong as an oak. But when a hurricane comes, the oak is uprooted, and the palm tree is intact, continuing to sway in the wind.
Storms do not affect the flexible.
When the storms of life arrive — and they will — be flexible and adapt.
They Don't Believe It's Possible
Going after your dreams is not for the faint of heart. It's hard.
However, regardless of how hard things get, you must believe in yourself and your dream.
We don't accomplish what we want alone. It's achieved with the help of other people. How do you expect others to believe in your dream if you don't?
Belief in yourself and your dream is possibly your greatest weapon. And it can be challenging to cultivate.
Remember this quote from Les Brown:
“The easiest thing I’ve ever done was to earn a million dollars. The most difficult thing I’ve ever done was to believe it could happen to me.”
Doubt your doubts. Believe in your vision.
They Lack Self-Discipline
Greatness will never be achieved or unleashed without discipline.
Talent alone will not sustain or give lasting success. It takes a consistent commitment, which only comes from self-discipline.
Think of any career and picture the best person in that realm. I guarantee you that whatever their craft is, they exercised self-discipline and showed up every day for their dream.
Lebron James is talented. He still trains every day.
Seth Godin has written a blog every day for the last 20 years.
The best, at anything, do it every day.
Discipline is doing what you said you would, regardless of how you feel.
Dreams will stay dreams unless they are broken down into goals. The bridge between goal-setting and goal-achieving is self-discipline.
They Don't Understand What Failure Is
When I was younger, I dreaded failing.
In my mind, if I failed, then that meant I was a failure. So I had a fixed mindset.
It took a long time for me to see what failure was: feedback and clarification.
It wasn't who I was, but rather my skill level then.
Failure is your friend. It lets you know where you need to improve and grow. It isn't your enemy, and it certainly isn't your identity.
The fact of the matter is this: Failure is one of our best teachers.
It's a feedback mechanism that helps us assess where we need to upgrade and refine our skills. That's all.
Use failure as a tool, and stop bashing yourself when you come short.
They Lose Hope
I once had a mentor that posed a question to me. He asked me,
"Chris, what can't humans live without?"
"Ugh…Food, water, and… oxygen?"
He then said,
"You forget one. And it's the most important element."
I drew a blank and looked at him, dumbfounded.
This former Army Ranger looked me dead in the eye and said:
"Humans can go thirty days without food.
Three weeks without water.
Three minutes without air.
But they cannot last three seconds without hope."
When all hope is lost, life loses its fuel and, for many, meaning. The fight is gone. So they give up.
In those moments, we tend to forget that our brains can only see what has happened and not what's coming. Change can happen in an instant. Anything terrible can turn around, and our fortunes can change.
Listen, I know it's hard.
Climbing up the mountain to your desired summit is beyond challenging. Painful at times. I have had to fight for every dream of mine. And I can tell you from experience. When you achieve what you've dreamed of, it's magical.
However, the alternative is worse.
When every window of opportunity to achieve your dream has closed for good, and the possibility of wishes fulfilled has left you, regret will take its place.
That sounds like a living hell to me.
So I beg you, please don't give up.
You already know what happens if you quit. Your dreams will stay just that: dreams. But if you follow your desire and endure, you never know what will be around the bend.
“Be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid.” — Sir Anthony Hopkins
Will it be hard? Yes. Will it be worth it? Absolutely.
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